Another Employment Malfunction

Last Friday was my Last Day at The Wright Way, a home-based business that furnishes small toys to places like Sylvan Learning Center for them to use as rewards for student achievements. The lure of the job was that the inventory was small and lightweight. Job was to be pulling orders, putting little stickers on items, packing them in a box. No dress code. Listen to music or watch TV. Eat, drink coffee, whatever. 11:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. No learning curve, no training, no interviews, no paperwork, no bureaucracy, no cost of clothes, no transportation costs, no pressure. Hah! In her dreams.

As is often the case with not-quite-legit operations, the owner turned out to be a nut case who wanted a personal maid. Her house was a pit with dirty clothes and used dishes everywhere and an overwhelming smell of stinky feet. (Due in part to her obsession with everyone taking off their shoes.) She wanted me to clean out her garage, vacuum, go through mountains of unopened mail going back to last August, and…this was the clincher…look at photos of men’s penises sent to her in response to her internet ad for a love match (I passed on that one). She changed my hours and the rate of pay, and wanted me to carry heavy boxes and transport them to UPS for shipping. She kept her house the temperature of a wine cellar, wanted me to listen to Barry Manilow, and talked on the phone constantly.

Please picture this old lady with arthritis, dressed for the ski slopes but in flimsy bedroom slippers, running up and down stairs in response to her boss’ summons. By the end of the day I was stiff and frozen and weary and angry and generally thinking the pitiful sum she was promising to pay me was NOT worth it. So three weeks after I started, I quit. I grabbed my last check and ran to the bank and cashed it before I e-mailed her that I was through and not coming back. Adios *%%##.

So now I am retired again. This is my natural state and I’m glad to be back to it.