Year's End

This last day of the year the sun has come out. After a month-long deluge of rain and inclement weather, it is most welcome. Mid-afternoon now, and the dogs are sprawled in a patch of sun light on the living room floor. Soon I will wake them up and we’ll have our afternoon walk a bit early today. The neighborhood kids have fireworks and treat New Year’s Eve like the 4th of July so it’s best to get inside and hunker down for the evening before the bangs begin.

For years now I’ve spent New Year’s Eve at home by myself. I will have the party lights on and the holiday decorations and Christmas gifts are still around. I’ll burn candles and incense and listen to music. Maybe watch Dick Clark on TV (how old IS he?). And page through my life.

So much happened this year that I ran out of space on the 2007 page in my Life Book. There are notes in the margin and around the edges. Tonight I may look through it and remember the events of other years. Maybe I will pull out a journal or two at random and see what I was feeling on some other New Year’s Eve. The readily accessible collection covers the last twenty years. Farther back…into the 70’s and 60’s…notebooks are packed in some box in storage.

On one of my birthdays (60?) I thought I would try to read all my journals. Not a good idea. It was too overwhelming to try to relive all those years in one sitting. So now I just spot check my past life. Sometimes I read of joy, sometimes of sadness. I tended to write more about pain and frustration and loneliness than about days when nothing happened. Still…it is impossible not to say “How far I’ve come!”

All my friends in far-flung places will be in my thoughts tonight. I wish each of you the very best. Have a Great ’08!